29 June 2009

The Merry Widow (1934)

I have heard (or should that be read?) much ado about director Ernst Lubitsch and the certain je ne sais quoi he brings to his productions, known in filmophiliac circles as the Lubitsch touch. 1934's The Merry Widow, it would seem, demonstrates that touch in ample supply. What is on the surface a rather silly musical romance becomes, thanks to Lubitsch's superb direction (to say nothing of the outstanding cast!), a highly enjoyable affair. In The Merry Widow, royal guardsman Count Danilo (played by the absurdly charming Maurice Chevalier) is tasked with seducing and marrying the widowed Madame Sonia (played by the lovely and talented Jeanette MacDonald), the seduction and marriage being a means of preventing Madame Sonia from leaving the minuscule kingdom of Marshovia with her considerable fortune (which constitutes half of all the wealth of Marshovia). I hope that I won't be spoiling anything when I say that Maurice and Jeanette do inevitably fall for one another and wind up together (although the ultimate circumstance of their romance is not quite what one might traditionally consider romantic, albeit in a good way).

What can I say about this picture that hasn't already been said? It veritably drips with the elegance and opulence one expects from an MGM picture of the 1930s. Perhaps the most shining example of this is the grandiose waltz scene--clearly, no expense was spared in preparing this rather impressive number. Of course, Maurice Chevalier and Jeanette MacDonald are excellent in the starring roles (the fact that they turned in such great performances in spite of their personal enmity is surely testament to their professionalism and ability as actors!). Miss MacDonald is also quite stunning throughout the picture, gaudy period garb notwithstanding. Edward Everett Horton is also great in his relatively small but quite likable part the distraught Ambassador Popoff, cementing his status as one of my favorite supporting actors. Una Merkel also makes a brief appearance as Queen Dolores.

Also of interest is the fictional kingdom of Marshovia itself. At the outset of the picture, we see that Marshovia is nestled between Austria-Hungary and Romania, in the region most would recognize as Transylvania (though there are no vampires to be found, barring the possibility that Maurice Chevalier is harboring a deep, dark secret). Culturally, Marshovia seems to be an amalgam of Russia, Hungary and the Ottoman Empire, giving it the appearance of semi-pastoral utopia that is just "oriental" enough to seem exotic, and just occidental enough to seem familiar. In fact, it is rather a nice analogue--both culturally and geographically--to the fictional kingdom of Graustark.

But I digress. I must say that I rather enjoyed The Merry Widow, and I expect that most other aficionados of classic movies will enjoy it just as much. Now I'm going to have to see the 1925 version of the film, as well (there was also a third version made by MGM, but that was in the 1950s, and, as a wise man once said, fuck that shit).

23 June 2009

"Excuse all the Blood"


Prior to her untimely death, Thelma Todd was well known in Black Metal circles for her distinctive vocal style and her occasionally gruesome onstage antics. She was also rumored to have kept a dead bird in a bag, which she would occasionally smell in order to, as she put it, "have the stench of death in her nostrils."

17 June 2009

Well, That's One Way to Do It


Judy Garland, Jack Haley, Ray Bolger and Burt Lahr do not fuck around.

14 June 2009

Ah, So That's Why You Love Lucy


As improbable as it may seem to one who only knows her from 1950's television shows, the truth still stands--Lucille Ball was, at one point in time, actually quite attractive.

13 June 2009

Free Associations, Ep. 9A: Taking the Joke too Far

In the last installment in my series of often bizarre free associations, I ruminated on the similarities between actress Joan Crawford and dictator Joseph Stalin, two of history's most memorable megalomaniacs. The similarities, it must be said, do not end with Mommie Dearest and Uncle Joe themselves. If Joan Crawford is the equivalent Stalin, it may be said with some--although not too much--certainty that Myrna Loy is the equivalent of Klim Voroshilov.
Kliment Yefremovich Voroshilov was one of Joseph Stalin's closest and most loyal accomplices, having served alongside him during the Russian Civil War. Likewise, Myrna Loy (nee Myrna Williams) began her Hollywood career at the same time as Joan Crawford; the two appeared as extras in the 1925 MGM production Pretty Ladies, and thereafter became life-long friends. Appropriately enough, Voroshilov was appointed both the Chairman of the Revolutionary Military Council and the "People's Commissar for Military and Navy Affairs" that same year. Myrna would receive an honorific title of her own, eventually attaining the rank of "Queen of Hollywood" in 1938 (not quite the same thing as Marshall of the Soviet Union, but it's in the same ballpark).

Naturally, there are a few minor differences. Primary among these must be the fact that Myrna never threw her former comrades under the proverbial bus for the sake of purging opposition from the party (although she might have, had Joan asked her to). Secondly, Myrna never had the honor of having a tank named after her (although she damned well deserved it!). Finally, it has to be said that Klim Voroshilov was rather a bumbler, both on and off the battlefield--his less than stellar leadership cost the Soviet Union tremendous casualties during the Winter War, and he later made an ass of himself by dropping the ceremonial Sword of Stalingrad when it was presented to him (whilst Stalin, Churchill and Roosevelt were watching, no less!). Myrna would never have conducted herself in such a shameful manner in the presence of her superiors. Furthermore, she no doubt would have crushed the Finnish army in a matter of days, had she been in charge.

One final thought: if Joan Crawford is Stalin and Myrna Loy is Voroshilov, I suppose that would make Christina Crawford the equivalent of Yakov Dzhugashvili.

10 June 2009

A Sure Sign of Obsession

I fell asleep extremely early last night, with the result that I had many quite vivid dreams. One of these took the form of a picture that starred Norma Shearer, Joan Crawford, Myrna Loy and Clark Gable (rather an ensemble cast, to say the least). As is so often the case with dreams, the details are sketchy, but I do remember that Myrna Loy was some sort of con-artist-cum-jewel thief, and Norma Shearer was the intended victim. What role Joan Crawford and Clark Gable played is somewhat less clear, but I'm fairly certain that they would have struck up a romance that would have complicated Myrna's diabolical schemes in some way or another.

There was also a merry-go-round involved, but I'm not sure that that detail doesn't make things even more confusing.

Ultimately, I am left with two nagging, unanswered questions: Why wasn't this movie ever made? And why can't I have more dreams like this?

06 June 2009

Normandy, 6 June, 1944

The Great Crusade begins.

04 June 2009

Musical Interlude: Любо братцы , любо

This is one of those songs that I like to sing at odd moments (or at least try to sing, given the linguistic difficulties).

Как на грозный Терек выгнали казаки,
Выгнали казаки сорок тысяч лошадей.
И покрылось поле, и покрылся берег
Сотнями порубаных, постреляных людей.

Любо, братцы, любо,
Любо, братцы, жить!
С нашим атаманом не приходится тужить!
Любо, братцы, любо,
Любо, братцы, жить!
С нашим атаманом не приходится тужить!

Атаман наш знает, кого выбирает-
Эскадрон по коням, да забыли про меня.
Им досталась воля да казачья доля,
Мне ж досталась пыльная, горючая земля.

Любо, братцы, любо,
Любо, братцы, жить!
С нашим атаманом не приходится тужить!
Любо, братцы, любо,
Любо, братцы, жить!
С нашим атаманом не приходится тужить!

А первая пуля, а первая пуля,
А первая пуля в ногу ранила коня.
А вторая пуля, а вторая пуля,
А вторая пуля в сердце ранила меня.

Любо, братцы, любо,
Любо, братцы, жить!
С нашим атаманом не приходится тужить!
Любо, братцы, любо,
Любо, братцы, жить!
С нашим атаманом не приходится тужить!

Жинка погорюет, выйдет за другого,
За мово товарища, забудет про меня.
Жалко только волю во широком поле,
Жалко мать-старушку да буланого коня.

Любо, братцы, любо,
Любо, братцы, жить!
С нашим атаманом не приходится тужить!
Любо, братцы, любо,
Любо, братцы, жить!
С нашим атаманом не приходится тужить!

Будет дождь холодный, будет дождь холодный,
Будет дождь холодный мои кости обмывать.
Будет ворон чёрный, будет ворон чёрный,
Будет ворон чёрный мои волосы клевать.

Любо, братцы, любо,
Любо, братцы, жить!
С нашим атаманом не приходится тужить!
Любо, братцы, любо,
Любо, братцы, жить!
С нашим атаманом не приходится тужить!

Как на вольный Терек, как на грозный Терек
Выгнали казаки сорок тысяч лошадей.
И покрылось поле, и покрылся берег
Сотнями порубаных, постреляных людей.

Любо, братцы, любо,
Любо, братцы, жить!
С нашим атаманом не приходится тужить!
Любо, братцы, любо,
Любо, братцы, жить!
С нашим атаманом любо голову сложить!


And if it seems that these musical interludes seem to have a decidedly Russian flavor... well, they have.